Couldn't resist :)

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JerrySambrook said:
Is he going to be fine in Texas?? :confused:
Their motto is "There are only two things in Texas. Steers and ...., and ratty has no horns":wink:
It is the place where they wear elastic clothing, there a stapede gets caused by the sounds of zippers, snaps, or velcro. :party:
Is the new Mrs Ratalina going to get taken away by one of them thar Texicans?:eek:

Lastly, how long before this jestful post gets deleted or vastly editted?? :frown::devil:

Jerry
Click to expand...
Oh Jerry. We would love to have you come visit us here in Texas. Here, men do not wear shorts or elastic clothing. Here, you do not "flip" another person off for ANY reason because - the other person may have a gun. Here in Texas, you best be driving a truck , a 4 X 4 diesel, lifted. Here in Texas, you do not mess around. Men are gentlemen and the ladies wear snug fitting Wranglers. Men wear their hats to church and BOW to remove their hats in reverence at the right time. Texas is a big state in many more ways than you think.
 
'Cause Texas SUCKS and Kansas BLOWS.:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:


That is just a joke... not meant to anger anyone. I don't know why it is so windy in Oklahoma..
 
Ron,
Did ya hear the one about the moron that moved from Louisiana to Texas?

Raised the IQ level of both states at once. :eek:


John,
Have some fun once in a while!

Jerry
 
I heard a pretty good one at the last chapter meeting too..

3 college football players were all at a bar. The first, a OU Sooner, walked up to the bar and ordered a "T.C." the bartender asked "What's a T.C.?" the sooner replied "Tom Collins".

The next guy, a OSU Cowboy, walked up and ordered a "P.C.", again the barkeep asks... "Pina Colada" the Cowboy answers.

Not to be outdone, the last football player, a Texas Longhorn, walks up and orders a "13". The bartender once again asks what this drink is... The longhorn replies:

"You Know, A seven and seven".
 
RAdams said:
I heard a pretty good one at the last chapter meeting too..

3 college football players were all at a bar. The first, a OU Sooner, walked up to the bar and ordered a "T.C." the bartender asked "What's a T.C.?" the sooner replied "Tom Collins".

The next guy, a OSU Cowboy, walked up and ordered a "P.C.", again the barkeep asks... "Pina Colada" the Cowboy answers.

Not to be outdone, the last football player, a Texas Longhorn, walks up and orders a "13". The bartender once again asks what this drink is... The longhorn replies:

"You Know, A seven and seven".
Click to expand...
:biggrin:


In case things get a little tougher during the next few
months, we In LOUISIANA, TEXAS, OKLAHOMA & ARKANSAS have a plan.

Maybe you don't know it, but LOUISIANA , TEXAS , OKLAHOMA ,
& ARKANSAS have a legal right to secede from the Union . (Reference
the Texas/Louisiana-American Annexation Treaty of 1848.)


Us TEXOARKLANS love y'all Americans, but we'll probably have to take
action since Barack Obama won the election and is now the
President of the U.S.A.

We'll miss ya'll though.


Here is what can happen:

1. Barack Hussein Obama, after becoming the President of the
United States , begins to try
and create a socialist country, then TEXAS , LOUISIANA , ARKANSAS
and OKLAHOMA announces that they are going to secede from the Union.


2. George W. Bush becomes the President of the Republic of
TEXOARKLA . You might think that he doesn't talk too
pretty, but we haven't had another terrorist attack and the
economy was fine until the effects of Barney Frank and the Democrats
lowering the qualifications for home loans came home to roost.

So what does TEXOARKLA have to do to survive as a Republic?

1. NASA is just south of Houston , Texas . We will control
the space industry.

2. We refine over 90% of the gasoline in the United States.

3. Defense Industry--we have over 65% of it. The term "Don't
mess with TEXAS ," will take on a whole new meaning.

4. Oil - we can supply all the oil that the Republic of
TEXOARKLA will need for the next 300 years. What will
the other states do? Gee, we don't know. Why not ask Obama?

5. Natural Gas - again, we have all we need and it's too bad
about those Northern States. John Kerry and Al Gore
will just have to figure out a way to keep them warm.

6. Computer Industry - we lead the nation in producing
computer chips and communications equipment - small
companies like Texas Instruments, Dell Computer, EDS,
Raytheon, National Semiconductor, Motorola, Intel, AMD, Nortel,
Alcatel, etc. ........................The list goes on and on.

7. Medical Care - We have the research centers for cancer
research, the best burn centers and
the top trauma units in the world, as well as other large
health centers.

8. We have enough colleges to keep educating and making
smarter citizens: University of Texas , Texas
A&M, Texas Tech, University of Oklahoma , Oklahoma State
University, UL-Lafayette, UL-Monroe, LSU, Louisiana Tech University,
University of Arkansas , Arkansas State University , Baylor, Rice,
TCU, SMU and MANY more.

9. We have an intelligent and energetic work force and it
isn't restricted by a bunch of unions. Here in TEXOARKLA, we are a
Right-to-Work State and, therefore, it's every man and woman for
themselves. We just go out and get the job done.. And if we don't like
the way one company operates, we get a job somewhere else.

10. We have essential control of the paper, plastics, and
insurance industries, etc.

11. In case of a foreign invasion, we have the TEXOARKLA
National Guard, the TEXOARKLA Air
National Guard, and several military bases. We don't have an
Army, but since everybody down here has at least six guns and a pile
of ammo, we can raise an Army in 24 hours if we need one. If the
situation really gets bad, we can always call the Department of Public
Safety and ask them to send over the Texas Rangers.

12. We are totally self-sufficient in beef, poultry, hogs,
and several types of grain, fruit and vegetables and
let's not forget seafood from the Gulf. Also, everybody down
here knows how to cook them so that they taste good. We don't need any
food from somewhere else.

13. FIVE of the ten largest cities in the United States and
THIRTY TWO of the 100 largest cities in the United States are located
in TEXOARKLA. And TEXOARKLA also has more land than California, New
York, New Jersey, Connecticut , Delaware, Hawaii, Massachusetts,
Maryland, Rhode Island and Vermont combined.

14. Trade: FIVE of the ten largest ports in the United
States are located in TEXOARKLA.

15. We also manufacture cars down here, but we don't need
to. You see, nothing rusts in TEXOARKLA so our
vehicles stay beautiful and run well for decades.


This just names a few of the items that will keep the
Republic of TEXOARKLA in good shape. There isn't a thing out there
that we need and don't have.

Now to the rest of you folks in the United States under
President Obama:

Since you won't have the refineries to get gas for your
cars, only President Obama will be able to drive around in his big 9
mpg SUV. The rest of the United States will have to walk or ride
bikes.

You won't have any TV as the Space Center in Houston will
cut off satellite communications.

You won't have any natural gas to heat your homes, but
since Al Gore has predicted global warming, you will not need the gas
as long as you survive the 2000 years it will take to get enough heat
from Global Warming.

In other words, the rest of ya'll in the USA are screwed!


Signed, The People of TEXOARKLA

P.S. This is not a threatening letter - just a note to give
you something to think about!

Sleep well tonight 'cause the eyes of TEXOARKLA are on YOU!
​
 
randyrls said:
Shouldn't that be "Duerme bien esta noche, porque los ojos de TEXOARKLA están puestos en ti!":biggrin:
Click to expand...

Tenemos una mano de obra barata que aquí en Texas. Si pudiéramos enseñar a los inmigrantes para hacer los coches, se podría competir con las importaciones.
 
Jgrden said:
Tenemos una mano de obra barata que aquí en Texas. Si pudiéramos enseñar a los inmigrantes para hacer los coches, se podría competir con las importaciones.
Click to expand...

I don't mean to show how dumb I am - but could someone translate all that? Or should I just pretend that "interchange" didn't happen?

Oh, by the way, I'm really glad to know Ratty's on the road again . . . and that his time "missing" was for his own "pursuits" going HOG wild.
 
Jgrden said:
Tenemos una mano de obra barata que aquí en Texas. Si pudiéramos enseñar a los inmigrantes para hacer los coches, se podría competir con las importaciones.
Click to expand...

CSue said:
I don't mean to show how dumb I am - but could someone translate all that? Or should I just pretend that "interchange" didn't happen?
Click to expand...

Not sure what it has to do with Ratty's tour, but here it is (I think). My Spanish is a little rusty.:frown:

"We have a cheap manual labor that here in Texas. If we could teach the immigrants to make the cars, it would be possible to be competetive with the imports."
 
Ratty is alive and well.... now that he's in GOD's country!

My house guest arrived and is not a happy camper so far! He took one look around and saw nothing but trees, not another house in sight and I told him we lived in the country on a few acres but not to worry, I generally leave the house at least once or twice a week to go into town.

Evidentally he got used to the big city life of Racine and liked the hustle bussle and night life and wanted to see some action so I promised him we'd try to get out and see some local sights.

When he arrived I tried to introduce him to our little Yorkie (Yorkshire Terrier) but Ratty took one look at Herbie and went totally nuts, carrying on and mumbling something about him being a worthless Sheffielder.

This morning we went out to the shop and ratty felt right at home and offered to give me some secret little tips on threading and working around a metal lathe, he just loves my little LED light and carried it around all morning pointing things out to me. When I told him I was a pen maker he was a bit shocked and asked where all the stainless was. He was surprised to learn that pens CAN be made without using stainless!

I snapped a few shots of him helping me around the shop this morning.

Holding a light while I do some drilling:
ratty-drilling.jpg


Giving me some tips on multi-start threading:
ratty-threading.jpg
 
Where's the Texas 10 gallon hat and the relish tray belt buckle?? I bet he would enjoy a Rangers game.
 
LOL George, he looked exactly the same when he showed me how to use my lathe too. I'm glad to see that he's still his normal charming self.:biggrin:
Hope we get to see a 'Texan' pic or two before you send him on his way.:wink:

How much holiday luggage has he gathered on his travels so far? We might need to trim it down a bit to keep the postage costs down. Its very kind for folks to add stuff, but it starts to make it expensive too.:wink:
 
So I'm way late on this whole thing, but I'm curious what the list is like and how far down the list we are. I'm all for being on the list. Add me if it's still open. We need some quality pics of Ratty. Glad to see he's found a mate within his own species. Don't know if he's been to Southern CA before. Maybe he would like a nice trip to the beach and a chance to hang with some beach dudes. I think a bathing suit might need to happen. No! not a speedo!

Martin
 
You can see the list here. It's pretty long and had a couple of delay hiccups, but he's on the move again and I believe he is still with George?
I will gladly keep adding names, but you can judge the time it may take to get to you.

The original post is now too old for me to update so I'll cut and paste it into a new one.
There has been some concern over postal costs because he has picked up lots of luggage so far. We don't want to spoil the fun by making it expensive to post.

I'm open to suggestions on how to reduce the load and speed it up a bit.

Here's a couple of suggestions;

1. Donate all the stuff that doesn't fit into his suitcase only.
2. Maybe give him a divorce and send his ex from half way down the list. They could meet up later.
3. Any other ideas welcome:biggrin:
 
Send him home, let him unpack and then continue his journey.

He has a room at your place doesn't he?:biggrin:
 
Hey, it's not like Ratty is going to die or anything. We are supporting the economy via the USPS and making donations to IAP when Ratty hits our door. I'm all for waiting. What the hell.
Martin
 
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