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I got this from a guy at limberjocks.
A retired friend of mine sent this to me and decided to share it with everyone here…........enjoy!
This is a warning to all not yet retired to watch out for those of us over 62 looking to make people laugh and stretch our imaginations.
Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Kirkland Nutra
Nuggets dog chow for my loyal pet, Katie, and was in the checkout line when
woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little
to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting
the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up
in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in
an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs
in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one
or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it
works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.
I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the
world to think of crazy things to say.
I ruined my keyboard as well
A retired friend of mine sent this to me and decided to share it with everyone here…........enjoy!
This is a warning to all not yet retired to watch out for those of us over 62 looking to make people laugh and stretch our imaginations.
Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Kirkland Nutra
Nuggets dog chow for my loyal pet, Katie, and was in the checkout line when
woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I'm retired and have little
to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting
the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up
in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in
an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs
in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one
or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it
works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.
I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.
Costco won't let me shop there anymore.
Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the
world to think of crazy things to say.
I ruined my keyboard as well