Welcome Steve, from far west Kentucky, to the addiction, sometimes referred to as the vortex. You mention that you have read some of the site, be sure to give the library a good bit of time. The link is at the top of the page. You will find an article called Library Index. This covers tutorials on about anything pen making you can think of. You will also notice that there are articles listed by year. Much good info there as well. When these fail to answer your questions, by all means post it here. I have never seen one go unanswered very long. You might also want to give this thread a good look. It has some very good info for the beginning pen turner;
http://content.penturners.org/library/general_reference/Getting_started_in_pen_turning.pdf. Grab some wood, make some shavings and have fun all the while being safe.
Have a look at the series of videos ed4copies has just posted showing how to complete a pen from drill to finish.
Steve, I understand some of your pain as my bride of 35 years passed in 2002. On her hospital bed, she selected my next wife for me. She was way too smart to come right out and tell me, so she asked this lady very nosy questions around me and got my interest up for a time when I would be ready. She and I have been married nearly 8 years now. May God bless you and your friend along with your efforts in the shop.
Charles