A senior moment ... at 48?

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Monty

Monty

Group Buy Coordinator
Joined
Mar 4, 2005
Messages
8,460
Location
Pearland, Texas, USA.
[FONT=&quot] $5.37. That's what the kid behind the counter at Taco Bueno said
to me. I dug into my pocket and pulled out some lint and two dimes and
something that used to be a Jolly Rancher. Having already handed the
kid a five-spot, I started to head back out to the truck to grab some
change when the kid with the Emo hairdo said the harshest thing anyone
has ever said to me. He said, "It's OK. I'll just give you the senior
citizen discount."

I turned to see who he was talking to and then heard the sound of
change hitting the counter in front of me. "Only $4.68" he said
cheerfully. I stood there stupefied. I am 48, not even 50 yet a mere
child! Senior citizen?

I took my burrito and walked out to the truck wondering what was
wrong with Emo. Was he blind? As I sat in the truck, my blood began to
boil. Old? Me?

I'll show him, I thought. I opened the door and headed back
inside. I strode to the counter, and there he was waiting with a
smile.

Before I could say a word, he held up something and jingled it in
front of me, like I could be that easily distracted! What am I now? A
toddler?

"Dude! Can't get too far without your car keys, eh?" I stared with
utter disdain at the keys. I began to rationalize in my mind. "Leaving
keys behind hardly makes a man elderly! It could happen to anyone!"

I turned and headed back to the truck. I slipped the key into the
ignition, but it wouldn't turn. What now? I checked my keys and tried
another. Still nothing. That's when I noticed the purple beads hanging
from my rearview mirror. I had no purple beads hanging from my
rearview mirror.

Then, a few other objects came into focus. The car seat in the
back seat. Happy Meal toys spread all over the floorboard. A partially
eaten doughnut on the dashboard.

Faster than you can say ginkgo biloba, I flew out of the alien
vehicle. Moments later I was speeding out of the parking lot, relieved
to finally be leaving this nightmarish stop in my life. That is when I
felt it, deep in the bowels of my stomach: hunger! My stomach growled
and churned, and I reached to grab my burrito, only it was nowhere to
be found.

I swung the truck around, gathered my courage, and strode back
into the restaurant one final time. There Emo stood, draped in youth
and black nail polish. All I could think was, "What is the world
coming to?" All I could say was, "Did I leave my food and drink in
here?" At this point I was ready to ask a Boy Scout to help me back to
my vehicle, and then go straight home and apply for Social Security
benefits.

Emo had no clue. I walked back out to the truck, and suddenly a
young lad came up and tugged on my jeans to get my attention. He was
holding up a drink and a bag. His mother explained, "I think you left
this in my truck by mistake." I took the food and drink from the
little boy and sheepishly apologized.

She offered these kind words: "It's OK. My grandfather does stuff
like this all the time."

All of this is to explain how I got a ticket doing 85 in a 40.
Yes, I was racing some punk kid in a Toyota Prius. And no, I told the
officer, I'm not too old to be driving this fast.

As I walked in the front door, my wife met me halfway down the
hall. I handed her a bag of cold food and a $300 speeding ticket. I
promptly sat in my rocking chair and covered up my legs with a blanky.

The good news was I had successfully found my way home.[/FONT]
 
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Mannie...that is hilarious...and yet...hilarious. There are times I wish I could get a senior citizens discount and I'm 2 weeks shy of 30. Of course when you have arthritis in every bone and you can tell when it is going to get colder out since 15 years old you always think you are a senior citizen.

I think I would have checked myself into an assisted living home after that but then again I do that stuff all the time.
 
Monty,

Thank you for helping me start my day with a good laugh. We all have our senior moments, but usually we like to spread them out over a period of days or weeks. Look at it this way, maybe you got a whole month's worth of senior moments out of the way in one trip. Either way, it was a great story. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Jim Smith
 
Mannie, just know this... I'm laughing with you, not at you. But that was some funny stuff right there, myfriend!

And if it makes you feel any better, I thought you were older than me.










But I guess I was wrong.:devil::rotfl:

Edit: Slow typing equals late post. I'm actually glad it wasn't you. I certainly wouldn't want a $300 dollar ticket. I can buy a lot of turning stuff for $300.


Ad FWIW, you ARE older than me....... barely. ;-)
 
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Unless he's not laughing Billy. I'm sure I'll feel different when I'm older but I could sure save some money on a few things now by getting those discounts!
 
THAT WAS FUNNY!


Well, all but the $300 ticket part.


I can't even imagine. I still get carded at the Liquor store from time to time.
 
What a great way to start the day, thanks. Actually, it's a very good thing that people around here keep the doors locked on their cars....... I've tried several:bulgy-eyes:
 
RAdams said:
THAT WAS FUNNY!


Well, all but the $300 ticket part.


I can't even imagine. I still get carded at the Liquor store from time to time.
Click to expand...


Last time in the grocery store, lady in front of me bought ciggys, she was walking with the aid of a walker and clearly well into her 80's. They carded her.
 
Needed a laugh just had my second surgery and so have to laugh inside as I can not friggen talk for 10 days! Wife loves it but I hate it! I also think someone might have been following me around that day!
 
Dang Mannie..now I need to clean the Diet Pepsi I sprayed all over my screen reading this.....and I was disappointed when I read it wasn't you, cause now I'm the only one I know who does stuff like that!
 
Alton and I were talking about this on the way to the last meeting.

I went to one of those places and the girl behind the counter gave me the
Senior Discount on a cup of coffee. Before I could even think about appreciating
the savings, I got indignant.

"Senior Discount?? You're closer to being in diapers than I am to being a senior citizen.."

I got over it. Now I take the discount.
 
There are often little idiosyncrasy differences in US buying versus in other countries. Just about every time we go home for a short while or for a year, we run into situations where simple buying produces situations like that for us. When in the south, we immediately drop into our strong southern accent and say "We don't live here" - as though that is a good excuse. We get dumb looks from clerks! Now we can blame it on "senior moments".
 
Mannie, my wife and I can relate to that story, we live 8 9 miles from town, we have to write notes to make sure we get what we go for, but sometimes forget to pick up the notes
 
Good story. Son you are just practicin, for when ya get all growed up, and catch up with the rest of us older than 48 crowd. If we were to call for a show of hands, of course no one would admit it.
 
Mannie, Great story, had to show it to the wife.
I am 52, but at 50 I paid up and got my AARP card as some said it provides many discounts. I have yet to go to a restaraunt and be at the age they allow to get the discount. My AAA card gets me better discounts on travel and other amenities, so I wont renew until I get to be the real age of passage.
 
Mannie, that is funny, thanks for sharing. As I was reading I was somewhat wishing it were my story - I'm always looking for good material to use for speeches at Toastmasters, I think that would make a winning speech.
 
What the hell's so damn funny!:mad:
Crap like that happens to me all the time and I'm only.....................crap now I remember why that happens to me.:redface:​
 
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